To my past self

I know you have been through some troubled times. I know you have overcome a lot of barriers. I mean you’re here today so your track record has been pretty good. But there are and forever will be some dark days that seem to pop up out of no where and knock you down. I know some of the things we used to do to get over those dark days were not the best choices. Some days even got pretty rocky. You didn’t know if we would make it or not. Good news though, we did make it. That’s why I’m writing this letter to you. Over the course of the years we have learned better ways to get through the dark times. Because we have utilized these healthier choices, the dark days have come around less and less. Here in the future we look forward to family time, playing with the dogs, getting good grades, and making memories with good friends. We don’t have to look forward to self harm or getting wasted to get a release. We use music, writing, running, yoga, and a bunch of other ways to deal with our emotions. We are a lot closer to mom now, she is one of our best friends. For the first time, our life looks great from not only the outside in; but, also the inside out. I’m not going to lie, it wasn’t east to get here; but, we did it and that’s all that matters. Everything you went through has molded the person I am today. I think if we could meet face to face you would see how far we have come and it would give you the hope you needed. You would talk to a funny, outgoing, kind, smart, beautiful, confident, sturdy, and just generally happy girl. I know it’s hard to see yourself in this way, but it’s where we have gotten— believe it or not. We have a great group of friends that will support us through anything. We have a family that we can go home to anytime. Three years in college later, and we are still going strong. We have actually accomplished most of that bucket list you wrote when you were 14. We have an even bigger bucket list now. What I’m trying to say is for all those times you thought we’d never make it; well, we really did make it and we have a bright future ahead. I’d like to thank you for holding on with the little hope you had through all those hard times. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be writing this letter right now.  Because you hung on so tightly it made us so strong. I’m pretty sure we can survive anything that tries to test us in the future. To my past self, I just want to say I am proud of you. To my future self, we’ve done it before and we can do it again better. But most importantly, I love both of you!

Love, Shelby Lyn Hisler



Don’t wait for someone else to tell you that you’re beautiful to believe it. Fucking tell yourself. Do things because you want to, wear makeup if it makes you happy, wear whatever the fuck you want simply because you want to, indulge, and destroy anyone who tells you otherwise.

(via backonpointe)

Sometimes your friends just suck…

I’m so sick of just having shitty friends. From drama, to being unreliable, to untrustworthy, and just plain horrible at being a friend. I know I’m just venting right now so I really shouldn’t be typing… but I can’t help it. I’m so pissed off. Plus, I’m being kind of selfish which just pisses me off more, because I don’t want to be that way. I may not know my flaws, I may not know what is said behind my back… but that is because no one will tell me. A true friend tells you the truth not matter what. That is why I told my roommate what you told me about her boyfriend. She deserved to know what is going on behind her back so she can straighten it out between herself and the people she needs to. It’s not like I went around telling the whole world that you were talking shit… I told one person; the person that needed to know. You could of told her but you didn’t, you told me; so what else do you expect? Don’t blame me for acting the same way over and over again if you don’t tell me I’m being that way. Slap me and make me listen if you half to. That is the only way I can improve myself is if you critique me! Also, keep the shit off twitter… you say you are mature, but it is real mature to just post your feelings about everyone and everything on twitter and not be up front about it. I’m trying to see the situation from both sides here, but that is just so hard to do with you. However, it is what it is, and I hope we can get past it for the sake of our… I guess you could say friendship (seeing as how I’m so much drama, that’s why we don’t hang out anymore.) I feel better now that I have told you what I feel, and I have vented to the internet world. Now it’s time for sleep.

I honestly couldn’t even tell you who my best friend is right now…. I feel so alone!

Reading these everyday when I wake up and every night when I go to bed! INSPIRATIONAL WORDS!

Reading these everyday when I wake up and every night when I go to bed! INSPIRATIONAL WORDS!

Living each day like it’s your last can be rather exhausting. There have to be horrible, bad, sad days inbetween to really enjoy the good days. So instead of living each day like it’s my last. I’m just simply going to live and leave it at that.
Shelby Lyn Hisler



(via ohbabyiwannagocrazywithyou-deac)

Maybe we’re drifting apart!!

Loosing your best friends is the worst thing in the world!! And it’s happened one to many times.